Turning Keys and Opening Cells My Ass



More like they get it from jacking off too often...

 Public concern about the workers' compensation payouts emanating from Menard escalated after the BND reported that about 230 claims of injury filed mostly by guards who claimed repetitive stress injury from using keys and pulling on cell locking levers generated more than $10 million in claims. The money was paid from public funds because Illinois state government is self-insured.In nearly every case, the claimed injury was the same: carpal tunnel syndrome of the wrist sometimes combined with cubital tunnel syndrome of the elbow allegedly caused by repeated stress from operating cell locking mechanisms. A single lawyer, attorneyTom Rich of Fairview Heights handled nearly half of the claims. He could not be reached for comment but in the past has stated that all of his clients were injured and wanted only to be healed and return to their job.

California may be the land of fruits and nuts but Illinois is the land of cheeky flim-flam boys and girls.