Tuesday, May 15, 2012

And Now, Mother's Day Deep Thoughts with Kenny Bing

next time, do me a favor and go to a sperm bank and do the rest yourself, bitch - Girl Power, Hot Shower
“I stay late at work just to postpone coming home to a screeching wife and kid. I don’t know which one is worse. I have no freedom, I can’t go back to college, I can’t travel. I feel as though I’m wearing a ball and chain. If I could have one wish it would be to go back and get a vasectomy before I met my wife…”

Yeah, I used to be one of the unfortunate ass clowns described here..  I’m nearing the end of my “responsibilities” and “duties”.   The youngest of the “little darlings” is reaching age 23 soon.  In a little more than 9 months, all of the strings will have been cut.  I’m thankful.  I hated the role the majority of the time.  I’ve nothing but resentment for the ties that existed which bound me to a woman that I came to fully loathe over a three decade period of time.  Familiarity breeds contempt, right?  I’ve tried to keep an attitude of “benign neglect” where her children are concerned and keep the deep seated dislike for their mother separated from them but often, I view the apples with the same eye that I view the tree.  In fewer than ten months, the four of them will not ever hear from me again.  I enjoy reminding the ex-Mrs. Bing (and by word of mouth, her offspring) that very soon, she’s going to be solely carrying the water for the wonderful, amazing, fantastic family that she oh so had to have for her “fulfillment” (as if that could really happen with that “glass-perpetually-half-full” malcontent).  

I’d sooner take a bullet than be called “grand-pa-pa” by some snot nosed brat raised by that clan.

“Having children ruined my life as well as hers. Why do women feel so obligated to have children even though they really don’t want them 24/7?”

From my own point of view, the bigger picture was this:  this was a cultural shift that I became ensnared within.  She was the wrong person for me to be paired with over anything more than a six month period of time.  It was the wrong person, wrong time, wrong place, wrong circumstances….for thirty plus years.

Marriage, children, family, home, possessions, SUV’s, pets, home sweet home, Christmas trees, hot chocolate, ugly sweaters, Easter egg hunts, grand children, chestnuts roasting over an open fire, family vacation, graduations, soccer practices, prom nights, high school football, marching band, mowing grass, washing cars, sickeningly sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet home is where the heart and family are is a grossly overrated source of happiness and, more often than is not, turns out to be a bullshit-encrusted fraud and a façade – especially if you are a man.  It is sold as a sizzling steak but it often turns out to be a shit sandwich on whole grain wheat.


  1. Isn't Obamacare going to make you carry her on your insurance until she's 26?

  2. "She" is a "He" and if Dr. Barry wants the little shit covered to age 26 he can add him to the Preezy of the United Steezy Blue Cross Blue Shield policy he carries.

  3. I can just picture Barry saying, "If I had a son, he'd look like "Bingvon"... bwahahahahahaha!


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