The Fat and Happy Boomer Bourgeois

Truly, no larger set of completely clueless and overpaid corporate morons has ever walked the face of the earth than what I call the Boomer Bourgeois.  I’m letting this one rip after talking with some half-wit “executive” over at the white ivory tower…  Here’s the backdrop – for Christmas, dickhead is buying himself a new SUV (natch) for himself, his 18-years-his-junior Bush League trophy wife, her brats from a previous marriage and probably some dumb ass inbred Golden Retriever… a $50,000 Plus SUV with all the bells and whistles.  He’s not sure how he’s “gonna work the deal” with “zero percent financing” or “GM cash back rebate” so he wants to bounce some numbers off yours truly.  I look up his account and lo and behold if this genius doesn’t have over $230k parked in a fucking checking account earning a giant goose egg in interest every month.  When asked, this reincarnation of old J.P. Morgan himself replies that "he read somewhere that one school of thought is that it was a smart move to use someone else’s money for this transaction while holding on to his own cash" (in an account that actually yields NOTHING….right….that’s so clever it is beautiful).  How this motherfucker weaseled his way into a gig that paid him enough to accumulate over $200,000 IN HIS ZERO INTEREST PAYING CHECKING ACCOUNT is beyond me.  Who the fuck did I kill in a previous life that I now have to carry this cross in this one?  My thought while talking with him is “You must either be really good at your job or give mighty good head or both to have landed your corporate warrior gig because managing your own money does NOT appear to be your strong suit, pal”.